I just sent in my final essay for the upcoming anthology IT'S A WONDERFUL LIE: THE TRUTH ABOUT LIFE IN YOUR TWENTIES. It's being edited by Emily Franklin and will be published by Warner in 2007. Emily asked the contributors to write something that fell into one of the following categories: Romance, Finances (or lack there of), Jobs and Career Plans, Family, and Friendships. Well, I decided to tackle romance. It seemed, in my experience, like it provided the greatest cringe-appeal, had the greatest potential for both honesty, humiliation and humor.


So I had to dredge up a long-term relationship from my twenties, and dredge I did. I remembered every awful moment, every tear, every disillusioned thought I ever had that at such a young age I'd met the one. And, in the course of going through it all, I discovered some ironic little details that were so perfect, I'm sure someone will think I made them up. Like the fact that, at a halloween costume party, my boyfriend and I were dressed as a cat and mouse (even if his was Mighty Mouse, a superhero, I still think my black cat was way more menacing than a rodent donning a cape).


It was funny how, when I looked back, it was like a text-book case of what not to do. I was a walking relationship don't, only without the black bar covering my eyes. Not that a black bar would have helped very much. Everyone seemed to know disaster loomed in our future, but I was eternally optimistic. And, when you're twenty-something years old, I guess that's what you're supposed to be. Hopeful. Even if, years later, you realize how hopeless you actually were.

Who could write something that was called "a white-knuckles ride all the way" and "an absolutely riveting tale?" Why, the person who's answering the two burning questions below, of course.

Natalie R. Collins is the author of WIVES AND SISTERS, a story of suspense set in the closed world of the Mormon Church. Here are Natalie's answers:

Q: What song would you love to find out was written about you?
A: Rosanna by Toto. But Natalie just doesn't have the same ring, does it....

Q: If you were going to be the inspiration for a song, what would its title be?
A: The inspiration for a song title? Trapped by the Mormons. Gotta be that one....

Here's a little more about Natalie's book, and you can also read about it at http://www.nataliercollins.com

WIVES AND SISTERS opens with a look back at the sudden disappearance of Allison Jensen’s best friend, who was kidnapped while playing in the woods near home. One moment her friend was beside her; then she was gone. When no leads emerged, she was given up for dead. Now, years later, trying to fill in the gaps of a patchwork memory, Allison still gets no answers from the Mormon community in which she lives. She is stuck in a world where she does not fit with a father who tyrannizes and torments her as the self-appointed messenger of God. Why is she being fed half-truths? When a brutal attack makes her desperate to escape Mormon bonds, Allison finds herself on a collision course with community leaders as they cover up the steps of a sexual predator.

Mark Peterson is trying to live a life of impeccable standards, dictated by Mormon tenets, and when he fails, the consequences are deadly, as he will do almost anything to protect his standing in the community of Saints. Allison is determined to bring Mark and those who didn’t stop him to justice, before they stop her from piecing together the tragic past that has haunted her for so many years.

The other day a charity called and said they'd be in our neighborhood, and asked if we had anything for them to pick up. I swallowed hard and said, "Yes." It was time.

Sure, I'd donated in the past, but there were items I just couldn't part with, outfits that I held on to year after year even though some part of me knew they'd never see the light of day ever again. The items that always managed to remain in my closet include: The Hawaiian print wrap skirt with matching top - perfect for those college luaus that were more cheap keg beer than tropical fruity drinks, not so perfect for anything else. The white Gap jeans from 1991 that I kept insisting I'd wear again, after all, white jeans were in this summer. The slightly acid-washed Guess jeans from 1988, although I'd never admit to them being fully acid-washed.

So I purged my closet and, in the process, took a little trip down memory lane. The aforementioned white jeans? Wore them on the first date my husband and I ever went on (even though it wasn't a date at the time, we were just friends who went to see a Led Zepellin cover band together, but he did slip his finger through my belt loop and held it while we danced next to each other). The Hawaiian skirt and top (yes, it was actually an outfit meant to be worn in public, not only to college keg parties) had been to several ComeonIwannalaya-themed fraternity events. The Laura Ashley floral dress that came down to my ankles was purchased with a paycheck from one of my first high school summer jobs. Yes, I actually owned a dress that was around when Wham! was hot.

Why did I save these things all these years when all they did was take up room in the closet? Was I truly convinced I'd fit into a pair of size 4 jeans for the rest of my life? Not really, but they were outfits that I could brush by and, for a split second, remember where and when they were purchased, or how, at the time, a paisley vest from the Limited sounded like such a good fashion choice. And they made me laugh at myself, and that was fun. Not as fun as fitting into a pair of size 4 jeans, but pretty damn close.